{y:i}Excited and anxious {y:i}I await my dream
{y:i}To escape, applaud {y:i}And embrace my team
{y:i}Opening day I always can trust
{y:i}It's just for this high {y:i}That I crazily lust
{y:i}Return of our hero {y:i}Does brighten the days
{y:i}Just briefly, my troubles {y:i}Get lost in the haze
{y:i}The grace from the field {y:i}Arouses the crowd
{y:i}Reflects on the days {y:i}When I was quite proud
{y:i}I'm more entranced {y:i}Than the average fan
{y:i}I used to play, you see {y:i}And I know I still can
{y:i}That time I drove the ball {y:i}With such loft
{y:i}My exit atop shoulders {y:i}As they carried me off
{y:i}This pastime and I {y:i}Just fade into one
{y:i}Expanded upon {y:i}From father and son
{y:i}My boy is young {y:i}And awkward for now
{y:i}I just need the time {y:i}And can show him how
{y:i}I really am quite close {y:i}Just a break away
{y:i}From straightening things out {y:i}And being okay
{y:i}I can help my team {y:i}To regain its glory
{y:i}With just a little twist {y:i}To the same old story
{y:i}Players say now {y:i}They play for themselves
{y:i}This causes a burning {y:i}Within me that dwells
{y:i}The fan is the one {y:i}Who pays for the game
{y:i}Which bestows all the riches {y:i}And welcomed fame
{y:i}The players will listen {y:i}But really don't hear
{y:i}All the while just hiding {y:i}Behind an invisible tear
{y:i}I grow tired now of all this greed
{y:i}And chart a course to set things free
{y:i}We got our first caller. {y:i}Is that Gil on the cellular?
Yes, sir, it sure is.
- What's that I hear in the background? - That's my Giants watch.
- I'm late for work. - Giants watch, great.
- What do you got for us, Gil? - It's just I'm really psyched.
Opening day's tomorrow. We're all psyched.
This is different. I've been waiting a long time for this one.
{y:i}- What are you waiting for? - Bobby Rayburn. We got him.
- We're going all the way this year. - What would you bet on that?
- I'd bet everything I own, that's for sure. - I like this guy. You think Rayburn's...
...worth the 40 mil, huh? - .310 lifetime batting average.
He's worth twice that, three times that.
{y:i}I bet he'd love to hear you say that. {y:i}Let's see if we can get him on the line.
- You're gonna get him on the line? - "Yes. Hang on. Let's find Bobby."
When we come back, we will be talking to Bobby Rayburn.
Great.
You got Bobby Rayburn on the line yet?
Who the fuck does this guy think he is?
- Three- time National League MVP? - That allows him to fuck up my show?
- "Hello, I got Rayburn on the line." - We got him!
{y:i}And go.
Welcome back, we're here with the hopes and dreams of all Giants fans.
Ex-Brave centre fielder and league RBI champ...
{y:i}... four of the last five years, {y:i}local boy come home, Bobby Rayburn.
{y:i}- How you doing, Bobby? - Hey, Jewel, how you doing?
Good to be talking to you. I want to tell you, I love your show.
- Thanks a lot. - Bobby, this is Bernie...
A lot of fans are on the line dying to talk to you.
But first, how does it feel to be back in the Bay Area?
I'm telling you, it's great. I grew up here. The Giants are my homies.
That's good to hear. But let me ask you this:
{y:i}You're famous for your {y:i}dedication to perfection.
You're one of the hardest-working players.
Don't forget "good-looking."
But come on, now. Bobby, baby...
...do you honestly think you are worth 40 million simoleons?
He's one of the best ballplayers in the league.
I'm glad you asked me. I don't like to put a money value on a human being.
But I think I have given 100 percent to every franchise I've played with.
Attaway, Bobby!
Thank you for not answering.
- Better retreat. - She's a riot.
What about the fans? Won't all this money raise their expectations?
I hope so. I consider myself a baseball fan first and a player second.
{y:i}And in the game of baseball, {y:i}it's all about the fans.
- You tell them, Bob. - And the Juan Primo controversy?
Giants centre fielder since 1990.
{y:i}You come in, bump him to the left. {y:i}Some people resent that.
- Bitch! - I don't think Primo's one of them.
You know, he's a team player.
That makes him great. I look forward to playing with him.
That's great, Bobby. Let's get back to our callers. Gil?
- Yeah, am...? Am I on the air? - Yes, you are, Gil.
Jewel, why do you have to be so negative?
{y:i}Come on, I'm a sweetheart.
The guy's making a lot of money. Would you turn it down?
You'd be nuts to turn them down.
Why be down on Rayburn because he's not nuts?
You got a point. I apologize.
- "Hey, Bobby, are you listening to me?" - I sure am!
- Thanks for backing me up, man. - No problem. It's a pleasure.
Just remember where you heard it first.
I played the game. I know what I'm talking about.
Grew up on the Giants.
My dad moved the family here when the Giants moved here.
I watched you ever since you hit the grand slam...
...against South Bay in the '82 city championship.
That's when I saw you were somebody special, and you never let me down.
When the two of you come together, Rayburn and the Giants...
...that's like a magical conjunction, like the alignment of the planets.
You're gonna bring us all the way. Who said it first?
You did, Gil! You did!
- Attaway, Bobby! - We hope so.
- Bobby, let's talk about your divorce. - Christ, look.
I just got to the ballpark. I'm really sorry, but I gotta go.
- Really enjoyed talking to you. - Anytime, Bobby. Good luckout there.
We will be right back.
- I am so surprised he hung up. - Thank you.
Giants haven't had a one- two punch like this since Mays and McCovey.
Joining the list of bullshit excuses...
...we've had a lot of whining...
...about product quality from certain members of our sales force.
Example: The lwo Jima line.
Gil, do you see any quality problems there?
Blade's too thin, pommel's too light, and there's a half tang hidden in there.
Maybe that's why you're not selling.
Sweet.
Somebody made a mistake, man. I wear number 11.
- I'm sorry. I didn't know. - It's cool. Manny, just handle it.
Me? I think this knife's an asskicker.
This door, on the other hand, comes off a foreign car.
Well, need I say more?
- Why are you guys still here? - There's been a glitch, okay?
- I'm working on it. - What's a "glitch"?
A detail that hasn't been worked out. Permutation that happens in...
What? With my number?
- Yeah, with your number. - No, no, no.
Manny, you know I wear number 11.
- Of course. - So there shouldn't be any problem.
It is a problem. Primo wears 11.
Tickets in yet?
Tickets? What tickets?
- Opening day. - You got other things to worry about.
I'll let you in on a little secret, Gil. You came this close to kissing pavement.
- How about that close? - Yeah.
Management had you on the list. I talked them out of it.
Don't make me regret it.
- Thanks, master. - Okay, fuck it.
I'm not playing with number 33. You understand?
I know. Just be cool. Let me take care of it.
Three times 11 is 33. You may play three- times better.
Thanks. I'll talk to you in a minute.
Jesus was 33 when he died. People still talk about him.
- Give me my number. - Think about it, seriously.
Should I fire him?
I should fire him, huh? I should fire his butt.
Good form.
Seriously. I promised those tickets to my clients.
Don't make me look like an asshole. Please.
- I do have a reputation to uphold. - A reputa...
Jesus-fucking"..."
Nobody cares. You're stuck in a time warp with your head up your ass.
- Why, because I don't wanna sell crap? - We are not dedicated to perfection!
People don't want quality. They want cheap product.
When that fucks up, they want to replace it, so that's what we give them.
You got till the end of the month, Gil.
Look...
...McKinley and Everest is our biggest account. You better close on it.
Bring in the fucking numbers.
Asshole.
Sid, what was the missing link on your ball club last season?
We'd have made the playoffs if Rayburn hadn't hit that three- run shot in Atlanta.
Everybody said, "Why don't we have a slugger like that?" Now we do.
- Bobby, a picture? - Why don't we take one with Primo.
- Sounds good. - Keep smiling.
Keep fucking smiling.
- I hope you like it in centre field. - Yeah, I hope you like it in left.
No more questions.
2.5 million signing bonus. Half this year and half the next. Yeah.
Well, well, if it isn't Jewel, my favourite token female sports reporter.
- Blow me, Manny. - I would, but you haven't had your shots.
There were also bonuses based on winning the MVP...
I want an interview with Rayburn, Manny.
Are we talking about "the overpaid, overrated SOB...
...with the pending divorce Rayburn?
- I call them as I see them. - Well, you've been crossed off the list.
- I knew you'd understand. - Deferred payments starting 2007.
Cut the crap. Are you saying there's no way to get your boy to talk to me?
Is that what you're saying? He's gotta talk to me.
I'm saying he'd rather nail his penis to a burning building.
- I'm not talking to you, I'm talking to her. - Ouch.
Checkout this puppy.
The walk and the talk.
How's it walk? How's it talk? This is the one.
Are you happy with your current supplier?
Any more of these demonstrations, I'll have to start shaving my legs.
Renard & Garrity hunting supplies.
The big motherfucker, the little motherfucker. Which do you want?
Any more demos, I'll have to start shaving the hairs on my ass.
As you can see, the performance on this baby is really something.
"Knife doing business.
Come on, bring it, baby. Bring it.
- Jesus Christ. - Poetry in motion, baby.
- Two behind home plate? - I'm your man.
Two hundred dollars each.
- Two hundred apiece? - Two hundred.
- That's a lot. How about 125? - Fuck 125. This is opening day here.
- Two hundred, goddamn it. Jesus. - Okay, okay, okay.
Now you want the tickets, huh?
Anytime I can do you more fucking favours, you just let me know, all right?
You in a coma or what, buddy? Get the fuckout of here.
- Know what bugs me about you guys? - Like I care.
You don't even care about the game.
You ebony god, you prince of darkness, you Othellian Moor, you black man!
You look good out there! You look good. I bet we hit.400 this year.
- Come on, don't jinx me. - I'm sorry, man. I get emotional, crazy.
All right, so tell me, what we got?
Spalding wants you to sign their balls. We got that Wish Upon a Star routine:
Sick kid wants to shake hands with great ballplayer. You'll have to do.
What do you think? Maybe I should bring a ball for the sick kid.
No, I think a bat would be much nicer.
All right, here. Give him a bat.
You know it's not a good time for this.
- What's the gentleman's name again? - His name's Stanley. Stanley Jackson.
Thank you, Michelle.
Stanley, Gil Renard. Renard & Garrity hunting supplies.
- How do you do? - How you doing?
Here's my card.
Are you happy with your current supplier?
- I sure am. - Well, then let me just...
If you could give me three minutes of your time, I will prove to you...
- Can I demonstrate? - Sure.
If I can just prove to you...
...we're superior in quality because of our fit, hand-sharpening, polishing...
...and strength.
These features, combined with our low prices, our superior terms...
...make us one of the most sought-after competitors around.
- That's why I'd... - We signed an exclusive with Gerber.
They got the whole chain sewed up.
We can't pass wind in a tent without going through them.
Sorry to hear that.
- Do you have the Little Pecker? - Yes, I do.
- You really are on the cutting edge. - Yeah.
I'm sorry we can't do business.
Well, you're sure I can't interest you in this?
You got any kayaks?
You gotta be out of your mind. Kayaks?
I could use kayaks.
Stanley, what the fuck do kayaks have to do with knives?
Never mind.
You fucking asshole. Kayaks? When I'm asking you about knives?
Yeah. I understand, sir. Thank you for coming in.
How about you get some kayaks and stick them up your fucking ass, moron.
Your stopwatch.
Hey, thanks a lot for coming. Nice to meet you.
Look. We got the same hairdo.
You sick too?
Hey, slugger, come on, shake his hand.
How you doing, man? You hanging in there? What's your name?
Sean.
Sean?
Sean.
Wow, what a coincidence. That's my son's name too.
Look, I have a present for you.
There you go.
Maybe it'll make you feel better.
Bobby Rayburn.
Tomorrow...
...hit a home run for me.
- Please? - I'll try.
They said "sick," not "dying in front of our eyes." How'd I know?
As if I don't have enough to worry about. I get a poor kid on his deathbed.
- Oh, please. - The kid was dying!
He has my son's name. I mean, what kind of shit is that?
Lucky tie, lucky guy.
McKinley- Everest.
Okay, thank you.
Hi.
- Angie, you're looking as lovely as ever. - He's gone.
- We had an appointment at 4. - Yeah, it's 4: 11.
My watch is slow, I guess. When will he be back?
He's gone for the day. But you can see him tomorrow at 2:30.
Oh, tomorrow, tomorrow"..."
Let's s"ee."
See if there's anything...
I would prefer the morning.
But how about late in the day?
I'm sorry.
Tomorrow at 3, he's off to Chicago for three weeks.
Well, that's a problem.
It's my son. I want to take him to opening day.
You know, myself as a father, I'm a real cutup.
I'm gonna get to the point.
I'm trying to be a hero to my son...
...so if he could make it any other time, it would really, really help me.
Just an hour later...
...so I could fit the game in.
- Excuse me. McKinley- Everest. - Any other time at all? Anything?
- Okay, thank you. - It would be a big help to me.
Like, an hour later.
I'm afraid I really can't help you. He's got such a crazy schedule.
Okey- dokey.
Drop your cock and grab your socks. Big day today. You excited?
Yeah, I'm up.
Manny, Manny, talk to me, man. Make me happy.
Wish I could. I just talked to Primo's people.
- They want 500 grand. - Five hundred? For what?
Exactly. Exactly. That's 250 G's a digit.
Man, come on! What is this boy smoking?
I tried to haggle them down. The kid says it's his lucky number.
Shit. Ain't that much luck in the world. He's lucky to be in the country.
I hear you. Look, it's your call.
You want me to go back, or are you happy with 33?
- Man, it's just a number, right? - That's right.
I'll pick you up. While you do her, thinkof me.
- That's a real short thought. {y:i}- I love you too.
- No, you don't. {y:i}- I'll catch you later.
Yeah.
Hey, Gil.
Hey, Ted.
Lose your job?
- It's my day off. And it's "Tim." - Tim. Sorry.
- You remember Mike and Linda? - Hey, Gil.
- Hi, Gil. - Hi.
- You're late. What a surprise. - Traffic. You know, traffic?
How original.
- Hi, Dad. - How you doing?
- Good. - Ready for the game?
- What time will he be home? - Depends on the game. Right, slugger?
6:05. He's not home, I call the cops.
I'm against this. I wanna make that real clear to you.
- He's my kid too. - Yeah?
Give me kisses. I love you.
- Bye. - For the record, so everybody knows...
...don't make him do things he doesn't want to.
I don't. Do I make you do things you don't want to do?
- No. - Okay?
Six o'clock, Gil.
Hey, Ted.
See you.
I remember when Mick recorded this, February '78.
What?
I remember when Mick recorded this in '78. We had a wild party afterwards.
Jason Pelligrini's dad says Mick Jagger's gay.
Yeah? Well, Jason Pelligrini's dad takes it up the ass.
- Tryouts are next week. - Tryouts are next week?
Your mother didn't tell me.
Jason Pelligrini said his dad's gonna pick me if I'm still available.
You'll make it. Positive things happen to positive thinkers.
Tell me, what do you gotta do? What are the three whats you gotta be?
- I don't want to do this, Dad. - At bat, come on.
- Keep the bat low. - No, keep it high, high.
- When you move your feet? - Step on the eggshell...
...and squash the bug. - Attaboy. That's perfect.
That's what Coop used to say. I told you about what Coop said, right?
- Your old catcher, right? - One of the finest athletes I ever knew.
Where'd you get that glove?
Tim gave it to me.
Piece of shit.
{y:i}Opening day at {y:i}Candlestick Park, 1996.
What's not to love about opening day?
Fathers sneaking away from work, and kids playing hooky from school.
{y:i}For at least one day, {y:i}everybody is in first place.
Opening day is what baseball's about. How exciting is it...
...for Giants fans with Rayburn coming hom"e..."
{y:i}... after leading the Braves {y:i}to a championship?
Did you see that? See the way he moved his legs?
- Can I have a hot dog? - A what?
Can I have a hot dog?
You're in my seat.
If it isn't the ubiquitous queen of AM radio herself.
Good morning, my sweet angel, darling, baby.
Oh, yeah, whatever.
Manny, come on, don't dick me around. It's an important piece, okay?
There's somebody there behind that killer smile. I promis"e..."
...I will not hurt your boy. I want Bobby Rayburn.
Bernie, correct me if I'm wrong...
...but isn't she the ball-buster who had the temerity to ask my client...
...if he was honestly worth 40 million?
- Am I a ball-buster? - Yeah.
Thank you.
- Whose is this? - It's mine. I spit in it.
I thought your mother confiscated that.
She did.
Play ball!
Yeah, attaway!
Strike.
What are you doing? You missed it. Hawkins struck him out.
- Pay attention. - I'm sorry, Dad.
{y:i}Blaze winds, and the pitch to Pryor...
...swung on and driven deep towards the gap.
{y:i}He crushed it!
- Watch, watch, watch. - What?
I got it!
Primo and Rayburn giving chase. They converge and"..."
{y:i}Lookout!
Centre field makes the calls.
Fundamental of baseball, centre field makes the calls.
Pay attention.
{y:i}Well, a scary moment on day one.
I'll tell you, Rayburn's slow getting up. And Primo's still slow getting up.
There's $40 million out there in centre field, Steve.
Hope the Giants have collision coverage.
This will help relieve the pain.
- Doc, is the rib bruised or fractured? - Neither.
Bobby, what are you doing? We got 161 games to go out there.
Could you excuse me for a minute?
Thank you. You just signed a $40 million contract.
Hurt yourself, you'll be batting .100 by month's end.
The media'll turn on you faster than the fans.
- Listen, you gotta come out. - I can't.
I gotta be Babe- fucking-Ruth.
It's William-fucking-Bendix. Get it right.
- You having fun? - Yeah.
I'm just gonna make some phone calls. Okay? Just business calls. I'll be back.
- Go? - Just downstairs for a minute.
Mom said we have to be home by 6, or she'll be upset.
Forget about your mother.
I got it!
The wind took it. The wind took it. Kid was lucky.
Wind took it.
- You stepped on me. - Don't worry. We'll get one next time.
Okay, I gotta go, all right? I'll be back.
- You don't have to pee or anything? - No.
What happened?
Lanz hit one to right. Bases loaded. Come on, grand slam!
Don't get greedy, son. What we need now is a sacrifice.
A winning team knows how to manufacture runs. Coop taught me that.
Know why he said the most beautiful play is a sacrifice fly?
- You sacrifice for the team? - And doesn't bring down your average.
That's why baseball's better than life. It's fair.
Tell me what happens.
{y:i}Now batting, number 33...
{y:i}... Bobby Rayburn.
Come on, Bobby!
Attaway, Bobby!
Rayburn look a little stiff to you?
I can't believe they left him in after that collision.
Right. That's all we need, our $40 million man on the DL.
He's playing hurt. That's a man showing his mettle.
Putting the team first. Remember, last year he hit.314 against lefties.
Yo, Bobby!
- Time! - Oh, fuck.
Come on, let's play some fucking baseball!
All right, Bobby, let's go!
Play!
All right, Bobby!
- Go for it, Bobby! - Go, Bobby!
Bobby!
Hey!
Hey, buddy...
...you wanna sit down? Trying to see here.
Go, Bobby!
Come on! Let's go with the fucking game! Shit!
Strike!
Are you out of your mind, ump? Are you out of your fucking mind?
- Hey, sit down. - Take your hands off me.
- Stop pushing, man! - Just ask.
- Why the fuck you pushing? I'm asking. - Both of you, down in front!
- Fuck you! - Down in front! Now!
Let's play some fucking ball! You all right?
What's your fucking problem?
You old busybody!
I gotta go, okay? I'll be back.
Fuck you!
Oh, fuck.
Get out of here.
So could you just send me over the stats? Yes.
Okay. Thank you very much.
I'm sorry I'm late. Your hair looks nice.
- I'm very sorry, but I'm afraid he left. - He left.
- For the ball game. - What?
Yes, for the ball game.
- I thought he had a plane to catch. - Plans changed.
But he did leave you this note.
- He didn't draw a smiley face, did he? - What?
The previous assistant got him in the habit of drawing a smiley fac"e..."
...instead of "sincerely," and I keep telling him it's not always appropriate.
No, it's perfectly appropriate.
{y:i}Now batting, number 10, Brad Tjader.
Hey, congratulations, fellas.
Hey, Babe- fucking-Ruth.
- William-fucking-Bendix. - That's right.
So did the kid see his home run?
The kid didn't even see it.
He slipped into a coma, and he never pulled out. I'm sorry.
- How come you didn't tell me? - Like you take bad news well.
What am I supposed to say? "Great news, the kid didn't make it."
That's all right, man. Enough of these hospital gigs.
They're off the list. You know what the bright side is?
You knocked the cover off the ball. You're back.
The hell I did. It was a fluke.
I never even saw the pitch.
Let go, Tim.
- What do you want? - How is he? He okay?
He's not. He's crying his eyes out. What do you think?
- Come on, don't start. - Don't you start.
You violated your agreement. I called my lawyer.
I'm getting a restraining order.
- Don't start. - No, don't you start. Go away.
- I've had it. I don't care what you want. - Let me see him.
You had to bring him home? What is wrong with you?
- I want you out. Tim, call the cops. - I'm gonna explain to him.
- Come on, everything's okay. - You bastard.
You motherfucker! You cocksuck...!
- Hey. - Tim!
Tim, call the cops. He fucking hit me!
Hey. Hey, slugger.
Slugger, I'm sorry. You forgive me?
- Hey. - You left me.
I know, I screwed up. I'm sorry.
- You forgive Dad? - Mom's got a terrible headache.
Well, that's called a migraine. She'll live.
Look what I got for you. I got your favourite pizza.
Gil, open the door!
- Gil, open the door. - It's got pepperoni and mushroom.
- I don't like mushrooms. - You can pick them off.
Is it true, if Mom marries Tim, I'm not gonna be a Renard anymore?
- Gil, open the door. - It's open!
- It's locked. - It's open.
It's locked, Gil. Open the door now. I'm calling the police.
You still worried about the tryouts?
I don't know. Think I'll make the majors?
Of course you'll make it. Remember what I said.
Positive things happen to positive thinkers. Who said that?
- Coop. - Damn straight.
He was the greatest player I ever played with.
Gil, unlock the door.
Got you a Coke.
Call the cops.
Didn't you hear me? Call the cops!
Call the fucking police!
- I can't drink Coke. - Who says?
Mom and Dad. I mean, Tim.
The door's locked. It's okay.
Gil, open the door.
Hey, Art.
I said, " Enough of this shit. You sign the contract right now."
He signed it. I swear to God, on my honour, he signed the contract.
Hey, Gil, got a second?
If you do. It's 8:00.
- Shall we? - There you go.
Sit down, Gil.
That's okay, I'll stand.
Chuck from McKinley and Everest called yesterday.
Said they wanted to drop their account with us.
I sent Figgy over there to sort things out.
You sent Figgy down?
- Sit down, Gil. - Yeah, he sorted them out.
He did it with my opening-day tickets. What are you gonna do about it?
- He didn't steal your account. - He did. What will you do?
We gave him your account.
I gave him your account.
What do you mean?
You're not getting the numbers we need.
I know. It's been a little slow last couple of months.
But that'll change. I've got a new strategy. It's gonna work.
- Listen, your behaviour is unacceptable. - What do you mean?
- People are scared of you. - Why, because of the other day?
You cannot do things like that in this day and...
I want your reorder book.
Outstanding commissions will be forwarded.
My father started this business.
Look, perfection and principles don't belong in business, not now or then.
- As a friend of your father's... - Keep your mouth shut.
You know nothing about my father.
- He made this business. - Your father made knives.
- San Francisco made this business. - By ripping him off.
He wasn't a businessman, Gil...
...and neither are you.
That's the bottom line.
{y:i}And so, in a Freudian sense, Jewel...
{y:i}... the catcher is the father, {y:i}and the son is the pitcher.
{y:i}Wow, that's fascinating. {y:i}Let me ask you.
{y:i}- What does the bat and ball represent? {y:i}- Well, the bat speaks for itself...
{y:i}... and, of course, {y:i}the ball is the ejaculate.
{y:i}Thanks for calling, doc. {y:i}Who do we have on line two?
{y:i}- Do we have anybody on line two? {y:i}- I believe everybody hung up.
Hey, man. Hey, you got a van? Kids are breaking into your van.
Somebody's breaking into your van. Stop those kids. Cut that out.
- What? - Kids breaking into a van out there.
- Yeah. - Here, this is for you.
- What's that? - Take it. Take it.
- Take it. - What is it?
It's for you. It's a temporary restraining order.
- What? - You have been s"erve"d.
Hey, man, can I use your...?
Okay, last one.
Good swing. All right, who's next?
Eleven. Let's go, buddy. Hustle up there.
- Okay, pal. - Come on, Rich.
Okay, watch the ball.
Good swing.
Next one, Richie.
Attaway, Richie boy.
- That's okay. - He's throwing too hard.
He almost took his head off. Hey, coach. Coach.
- Yeah. - Slow down.
- This is Little League. Little League. - I know.
- Leave him alone, Gil. - Mind your fucking business.
Hey, coach, mix in some strikes. What are you doing?
- You're making it hard. - I'll coach from here.
- Mix in some strikes. - He's throwing strikes, Gil.
- Fuck it, I'm gonna go down. - Easy, Gil.
Remember, Ellen's got that restraining order on you.
- The bat is too fucking heavy. - Come on.
You fuck with me, I'll send your head into the outfield.
Go easy. You're letting the bat swing him.
- Hey, hey, come on, you guy. - Look how heavy this bat is.
Here.
Let go of my son.
- He's my son too. - Don't remind me. Get off him.
- He's my son too. - You are not gonna ruin our lives.
- Tim, call the cops now. - I'm just trying to tell him something.
Get out of here. Tim!
You get out of here. Can't you read, stupid?
The restraining order says you have to stay 100 yards away.
- Tell him one thing. - You can't come near him.
- I wanna tell him one thing. - Get out of here.
- I just wanna tell him one thing. - You better go.
Don't swing at anything. Wait for a good one.
Step on the eggshell, squash the bug. Okay?
You mind your fucking business. You're lucky.
Just give him... Give him something. He's a kid.
It's okay. Play ball.
{y:i}Bobby Rayburn again {y:i}failed to earn his k eep.
{y:i}Almost grounding into {y:i}a game-ending double play...
{y:i}... just beating the throw to first.
{y:i}When the Giants {y:i}needed a pick-me-up...
{y:i}... number 11, Juan Primo, {y:i}provides San Francisco with a lift.
{y:i}And it was a big one. His two-run {y:i}shot over the left-field fence...
{y:i}... scored Rayburn, {y:i}and the Giants went home happy.
{y:i}That is, except possibly {y:i}Bobby Rayburn...
{y:i}... whose lackof hitting is giving {y:i}new meaning to the term "three hole."
{y:i}The way Primo's carried {y:i}this team on his shoulders...
{y:i}... mak es you wonder who the real {y:i}$40 million player is.
{y:i}Lanz came up with a big hit to drive {y:i}in a k ey run in the Giants' victory.
{y:i}Jimmy has been a spark plug {y:i}during this home stand.
Motherfuck.
{y:i}Ladies and gentlemen, now batting, {y:i}the centre fielder, number 33...
{y:i}... Bobby Rayburn.
All right, Bobby, let's go!
All right, Bobby.
Strike.
- Strike thr"ee." - Shit.
{y:i}Ladies and gentlemen, {y:i}with courtesy to the players...
{y:i}... please refrain {y:i}from excessive noise...
{y:i}... and throwing anything {y:i}onto the field. Thank you.
Forty-million-dollar man's paying off, huh?
{y:i}Now batting, number 33, {y:i}Bobby Rayburn.
Well, here it is, Memorial Day weekend.
You think back to the opening-day grand slam, doesn't seem long ago.
{y:i}But lately, Bobby Rayburn {y:i}has really had difficulties...
{y:i}... and can't seem to find his strok e. {y:i}He lacks aggressiveness.
And you start to wonder when you call it a slump.
{y:i}Most superstars aren't gonna {y:i}sit down for you.
{y:i}But you gotta wonder...
{y:i}... when he's gonna {y:i}breakout of this thing.
Strike.
Come on, Bobby. Come on.
Out.
{y:i}Now batting, number 46, Jimmy Lanz.
You'll be all right.
You still want that interview?
You'd let Bobby Rayburn do an interview with a...? What was it?
- Castrating ball-buster. - Castrating ball-buster, that's it.
- I thought I was off your list. - Come on.
Schindler has a list, not me, okay?
When you're hitting.183, you don't get to have a list.
{y:i}Lock er room.
- "Giants' lock er room." - Bobby Rayburn.
- "Yeah, who's calling?" - A friend of his. I have to talk to him.
It's really important.
{y:i}Rayburn, phone.
- Yeah, this is Bobby. - "Bobby?"
- Yeah. - Bobby Rayburn.
"Yes. Yes, who is this"?
{y:i}Hello. Look, say something.
{y:i}Hello?
{y:i}Yo, Stook, I thought you were {y:i}supposed to screen my calls here.
- Burn, baby, burn. - Come on, give me some.
- What's up, Dad? Gaining a little weight. - Yeah, yeah, I am.
- Stopped by the doughnut spot. - Cool. Is he for me?
Yeah, he's for you.
What's his name?
- He told me it's Bradley. - What else did he say, Dr. Dolittle?
Dad, how come you haven't been hitting?
How's the rib cage, Bobby?
My rib cage is sick of people asking about it.
They say you should've came out that first gam"e..."
...but you were hot-dogging, so you screwed yourself.
That supposed to be a dis or something? I hit.314 last season.
- That's bullshit. - I'm telling you what people say.
I can put a positive spin on this.
- How? - How? I'll tell you how.
We set up an interview, get a piece out of it.
You tell the people why you stayed in. It's for the kid in chemo.
You get public sympathy. I smell forgiveness in the Bay Area.
- Is that exploiting the kid's death? - Not comfortable with it?
- Should I be? - I think you should be.
Well, I don't think I am.
Excuse me. I'll have a vodka and orange juice, please.
And whatever the lady wants.
Jackon the rocks, thanks.
What?
Oh, shit. I did it again, didn't I?
No, it's okay. I'm used to all of this interview shit.
Look, no offence intended, but it's no secret...
...that you're playing like shit. It's gotta be affecting you.
Of course it's affecting me.
I'm paid to produce. I can't even hit the side of a barn.
- How do you think it makes me feel? - Do you know what I think, Mr. Rayburn?
No, but I'm quite sure you're gonna tell me.
I think the slump is a good thing.
Now, what kind of twisted shit is that?
It's gonna teach you to cut yourself a little slack.
- You can't keep up this act forever. - Now it's an act.
Oh, yeah, Mr. Perfect. Mr. No-Error. Nobody can live up to that shit.
You gotta give yourself a break. It's just a lie anyhow.
Yeah. It doesn't seem like a lie when I'm hitting.
{y:i}Now batting for the Giants, {y:i}number 11...
{y:i}... the right fielder, Juan Primo.
Sit down, let Bobby bat!
He's a hot dog. He's lucky.
{y:i}Now batting, number 11, Juan Primo.
{y:i}Now batting, number 33, {y:i}Bobby Rayburn.
Let's play some fucking ball!
Thanks, Primo.
Fuck you, Rayburn.
- You suck. - Bobby, Bobby.
You suck!
Don't listen to them, Bobby!
Okay.
Line drive to the right.
Don't tell me where it's gonna go, Dad.